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If you’re an INFP, the concept of intentional living will almost certainly interest you. If you’re unfamiliar, intentional living, at its core, just means focusing on meaning and purpose in your everyday life.
Movements like minimalism and essentialism – which I write about a lot here – support that same goal: to choose every aspect of your life with intention. Instead of just letting life “happen” to them, proponents of intentional living carefully consider their commitments, jobs, relationships, and even daily habits. And they select only the most meaningful to have a place in their lives.
As I explained in my Enneagram series, I see personality typology as extremely useful in crafting a more intentional life. That’s because frameworks like the Enneagram and Myers Briggs help you look within and gain more self-knowledge.
And who’s better at that than the INFP, by the way?
If you don’t know much about the Myers Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) or the corresponding personality typology system, you can read a summary at Simply Psychology. It’s based on a theory of cognitive functions (we’ll get into those below), which was originally developed by Swiss psychologist Carl Jung.
If you don’t know your type, there are free online tests available. However, I recommend that you take a quiz result as a suggestion rather than a final answer.
You can also read about all the 16 personalities in this system and determine which fits you best. I recommend sources like the Myers and Briggs Foundation or 16 Personalities.
Who is the INFP?
In the cognitive function model, the INFP leads with Introverted Feeling. This function is directed inward, and it is highly individual.
Introverted Feeling focuses on personal values and feelings. The INFP takes the time to figure out what matters to them. They deeply respect the value of each individual person, often in addition to animals, plants, and nature itself. You’ll find many INFPs in activist, volunteer, and non-profit communities.
The INFP determines their values individually. Even if their peers or the broader culture don’t agree, they will speak out for what matters to them. They’re also willing to express themselves in whatever way is most authentic to them, regardless of what anyone else thinks. And they’re tolerant of others doing the same.
Their second strongest function is Extraverted Intuition, which can be summarized in a single phrase as “idea generating.”
This means the INFP personality type is very creative and adept at thinking outside the box. They are in their element when brainstorming and coming up with possibilities.
The weakest function of the INFP is Extraverted Thinking. This function is all about creating structure and producing real-world results based on empirical data. The INFP can view strong users of Extraverted Thinking as rigid and authoritarian, quashing others’ individuality and the whimsical joys of life in their quest for efficiency.
That being said, structure and organization are vital components to achieving any goal. Because INFPs undervalue it, they can struggle to turn their ideals into real-world impact.
Why You Need Intentional Living as an INFP Personality Type
Personally, I see intentional living as helpful for all personality types. But there are a few reasons it’s particularly useful for the INFP.
1. Personal Values Are of Utmost Importance to the INFP
Above, we talked about the Introverted Feeling function, which focuses on values. For an INFP, personal values are a primary focus in life. But the world often tries to pull us away from our values. We’re encouraged to focus on productivity, wealth, appearance, and social standing – whether those are values for us individually or not.
INFPs can feel isolated because it seems like the rest of the world is simply on a different wavelength. But consciously adopting an intentional mindset can help immensely. When you’re certain of what your priorities are, it’s easy to look past all the “noise” of modern life and focus on what’s important. This clarity can feel like a huge relief to an INFP.
2. They Can Struggle with Self-Discipline
When INFPs discuss their personal development struggles, one topic that always comes up is self-discipline. While the INFP naturally excels at introspection and idea-generating, they spend less time and effort on real world action.
What that looks like in practice is coming up with fantastic ideas but failing to follow through with consistent action in the long term. The ideas then don’t come to fruition and the INFP feels like they “failed.”
That’s where intentional living can help. Once you decide what matters to you, action easily follows. Also, when you decide on your priorities, you also decide on what isn’t important to you. And that makes it easier to discard inessential habits and commitments to free up energy for what really matters.
3. INFPs are Idealists
All “NF” types are considered “Idealists” in the Myers Briggs system. And the INFP certainly fits this label. However, they often care deeply about many different causes.
The intentional living framework encourages individuals to choose one cause that matters most to them. And then spend their energy on that. Instead of being frozen in action due to the overwhelming number of problems in the world.
4. They Sometimes Feel Isolated
INFPs care deeply about values, feelings, and individual identity. The world at large – or at least Western culture – tends to prioritize a very different set of values. Think: economic productivity and conformity.
The result is that INFPs can feel isolated and misunderstood in many social groups. At school, at work, and in typical social settings, INFPs can end up feeling like they’re aliens unable to relate to those around them.
Intentional living helps by making it easier for the INFP to find “their people.” By deciding what matters most and moving towards it, they’ll naturally find themselves among others who share their values.
Why INFPs Can Struggle with Intentional Living – And How to Cope
For all the reasons above, intentional living can be incredibly beneficial for INFPs. But every type will also have certain struggles with implementing it. In a world that’s determined to distract you, it’s not easy to stay intentional!
Here are the things the INFP will likely find difficult – and what to do about it.
1. Narrowing Down Goals
In the advice below, I suggest that the first step for intentional living is to narrow down your primary goals in life. This gives you clarity that allows the rest of your life to fall into place.
However, this isn’t easily done for INFPs, who care deeply about many things. Like all Perceivers (“P” types), INFPs dislike the idea of closing off possibilities and deciding on just one path.
My best advice is to start out treating this activity like a thought experiment. What if you were forced to choose just 5 important things in life? What might those be?
Once you have them, set a timeframe and move forward assuming those are your most important goals. If, after that period (say, a year), you find yourself dissatisfied, you can go back and edit the list.
But you may be surprised to find you’re actually doing much better without all those extraneous possibilities and alternate paths.
2. Following Through to Make Real-World Changes
As is the case for most people at the start of their intentional living journey, narrowing down your primary goals may lead you to discover that you need to make some big changes.
You may realize you’re in the wrong job, the wrong relationship, or even the wrong part of the world. INFPs are excellent at being honest with themselves. They’ll identify these things easier than most.
The problem will come with the follow-up. Since INFPs are naturally better at introspecting and brainstorming, and weaker at real-world action and consistent follow-through, they may hesitate for quite a while to make the necessary changes.
Similar to the advice above, I suggest first engaging in brainstorming. That’s where you feel most comfortable, and you don’t need to put pressure to take action right away. Just journal about changes you could make to align better with your intentions. Make a list.
If you need to change careers for example, first just explore what’s out there. Do some information gathering. This is a baby step that won’t seem intimidating. But it could lead you to get so excited about a potential new career path that you do end up taking action.
The key is to stay curious and keep exploring what’s out there. But without putting pressure on yourself that could lead you to give up on the whole project.
3. Self-Doubt
In any discussion about INFP career and life advice, the phrase “self-doubt” will come up. Because INFPs are so adept at introspection and self-analysis, they are skilled at finding “problems” with themselves and reasons their situation is hopeless.
They are idealists with extremely high standards, so it’s easy to convince themselves that it’s not worth trying because their life will never be “perfect.”
When you approach the idea of living more intentionally, you could fall into a trap of imagining a perfect life and then getting discouraged, doubting that you could ever make it real.
Changing your mindset will help immensely. Think of the process – making life changes, striving towards goals – as the point. Sure, you may never reach that perfect ideal, but there is beauty in the effort. And I can say with certainty that if you engage in the process, you will end up in a better place than where you started.
Intentional Living Superpowers of the INFP Personality Type
While the list above points out a few snags INFPs will likely encounter in their journey towards intentional living, it’s also important to point out the areas where INFPs will thrive beyond all other personality types.
In many ways, intentional living is made for the INFP.
1. Identifying What’s Meaningful to Them
For many other personality types, it can be hard to even start the process of intentional living. That’s because they aren’t even sure what matters to them personally, beyond what others think or what their upbringing has emphasized. Many types find it incredibly difficult to do the kind of introspection required to discover one’s life priorities.
Not so for an INFP. This personality type is naturally attuned to what they value and what has meaning for them personally. They will not be intimidated at all by the task of thinking deeply about what matters to them as individuals.
2. Courage to Stand Against Societal Norms
In the same vein, many people find it hard to go against societal norms. Even if they know what matters to them most, they are hesitant to prioritize it because of what others might say.
Intentional living requires a certain amount of courage. In order to prioritize your values, you have to be willing to stand up for them even against pressure and judgment from others.
Luckily for the INFP, this personality type isn’t overly concerned with what others think. They are much more willing than other types to march to the beat of their own drum and express themselves in a way that is authentic to them.
While you as an INFP may take this quality for granted, it will be a superpower as you embark on your intentional living journey.
3. Thinking Outside the Box
I’ve mentioned a few times in this post that INFPs excel at brainstorming, due to their auxiliary Extroverted Intuition.
For some personality types, even if they recognize that they’re not happy, it’s hard to think beyond cultural norms and their current lifestyle to imagine a different kind of life.
This isn’t an issue for an INFP who thrives on ideating and creative imagination. It’s easy for this type to picture how they could do things differently. They’ll explore all options – even ones that seem “out there” – which means they have an excellent chance of discovering a path that would be truly fulfilling.
Practical Tips for Intentional Living as a Personality Type INFP
1. Determine Your Primary Goals
Step 1 is the same for every personality type starting their intentional living journey: determine your primary goals.
Sounds straightforward enough. But it actually might be the hardest part. I suggest starting with these self-reflection journal prompts to uncover what’s most important you. And what you can let go.
For INFPs, the hard part will be narrowing things down. Start with a long list of things that matter. Then challenges yourself to narrow the list to just 5 top priorities. Don’t think of it as a final answer that will dictate the rest of your life.
But do think of it as an experiment in intentional living. Remember, you can always edit your list in time if your priorities shift.
2. Brainstorm Possibilities
Again, INFPs thrive in the realm of brainstorming and dreaming up possibilities.
Working from the list you just made, think: what are all the ways in which you could change your life to better pursue them?
What things would you do more of?
What things would you spend less time on?
Enjoy the brainstorming process and get creative.
3. Write a List of Your Doubts and Fears
This sounds strange, but it’s incredibly helpful to see these things – which can often feel nebulous – objectively in writing.
A topic that comes up often in personal development advice from INFPs is the problem of self-doubt. After the fun of brainstorming fades, the self-doubt kicks in to make it harder to move forward.
One way to handle this is to actually write down the doubts you’re having and read them out. Once put into words, they’ll seem less intimidating. And some may seem downright silly.
You can even go further by countering each one of them. Ask yourself, “So what?” What if that fear came true? You’ll often see that it’s not as life-ending as you tend to think.
4. Stick with Your Goals for a Set Period of Time
Often, INFPs feel excited by a new path and get started with lots of enthusiasm. But then they start to doubt if it’s really the “best” one. They might then shift to another path.
That’s not inherently a bad thing. But it can be hard to make true progress without consistent follow-through.
To combat this, set a time period – whether that’s a month or a year. And promise yourself that you’ll move forward with the priorities you chose for at least that amount of time before giving up and switching tracks.
This way, you leave the door cracked open for if you really did make the wrong choice. But you also give yourself enough time to see things through.
5. Talk to Others About Your Intentional Living Project
INFPs are introverts, and their emotional processing is done internally. They don’t need others to help them think through big life questions. And it may not feel natural to even talk about their plans for changing their life with anyone else.
The benefit of doing it, though, is that others will hold you accountable. When you struggle with follow-through, it can be helpful to have friends and loved ones who might ask, “How’s your job search going?” Or, “Did you apply to that degree program you were talking about?” Or even, “Have you managed to reduce your screentime lately like you mentioned last week?”
INFPs don’t need conversations with others in order to think through their values or identify their feelings. But pulling others into your intentional living journey can help you with the next step – taking real-world action.
What Do You Think?
Are you an INFP? What has helped you live a more authentic life? What have you struggled with? I’d love to hear from you in the comments!
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How to Live Intentionally as a Personality Type INFJ
The Best Personal Development Advice for the Enneagram Types
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